"Ajeeb" Prem ki Bakwaas Kahani...

So yea! I saw the movie...
Finally... whew!
It took me two days... coz I could only see it in small doses...

Viola was right when she said "Ajeeb"... it was a slip-of-the-tongue on her part... but oh! so true!
I mean I kinda expected a Hindi movie with dorky-faced Ranbir Kapoor to not make sense... but this exceeded even those expectations...
Where do I begin?

Enter Tony Braganza (dorky villian # 1.... yea! there's more than one dorky villian in this piece of shit called a "movie").... So well... Tony is an ass and he wants to marry Jenny (Katrina)... If she refuses to marry him... He will "forcefully" make her his wife in his bedroom... oooooooh!... Since when do men have to "forcefully" make women anything?... Is there a dearth of women to sleep around with?... Aren't men running away from marriage?? We women have to "force" them to commit!!!!... The best part is.... hehehehe.... Tony will financially help Jennys family if they convince her to marry him... So he has to pay her MONEY and still force her???.... what a loser!... hehehe

There's a lot of confusion as to Ranbir (Prem) & Katrina (Jenny's) proposal.... So Prem tells Jenny- "Jenny I like you a lot... Will you be my life-partner?" ... to which she replies "You've said all that I wanted to say"... Damn right sounds like a proposal to me! An "accepted" proposal... Not the case apparently.... When shes sent off to Goa to marry Tony... Prem rescues her and she admits to being in love with some other idiot named Rahul.... I was like come on! Why the hell were you prancing around to a love song with Prem then?

Even the beginning of the 'Tera hone laga hoon' song doesn't make sense... It goes something like..."shining in the setting sun like a pearl upon the ocean - come feel me - come heal me".... So you want her to touch you? or medicate you? Make up your mind dumb-ass! And so these idiotic lovers-or-not-lovers romance to this merry tune only for us -the stupid audience - to find out that it wasn't romance after all.... we are so dumb!... life-partner means "friend" doesn't it?? silly us...

And what's with the Indian Christian accent?.... So we all go like "Hey man! Hum aata... tum jaata... Hum God ko bolta hai... Humra Jejus bahut acha... (pronounced Jee-jus NOT jee-zus).... Come on! Give us some credit! We speak some pretty damn good Hindi... We are not all Tonys... Our grey cells aren't dead... Though the directors did try to kill us of boredom through this movie...

We survived it! Woo-hoo! Even the popcorn and fizz didn't help in making this dribble go down better...

Note to self: If it seems dumb... it usually is. Proceed only without a brain.

Conversations in the train...

Well... so yea... I missed my bus... again...
Squeezed myself into the train... again...
Wind in my hair... sun on my face... I was feelin pretty darn good... grateful to be alive...
Some women had squeezed their little butts & were squatting near the train door, sounding surprised as to how uncrowded the train was.... ("uncrowded" in Indian terms means... yea we're all standing and still breathing...wow!... our guts aren't tryin to squeeze themselves outa our mouth!)... So anyway... they were chitti-chatting & ribbing each other in "amchi Marathi" and I pulled out my brand-spankin-new Sony mp3 player (which is pink by the way... just so that no guy may ever wanna own the thing)... and I was merrily listening to my Gospel music (MercyMe, Avalon & Casting Crowns are totally my faves) and zippin across stations in a merry mood... when I chanced to look down at the women talking (I was standing of course!... imagine my butt tryin to squeeze into a small nook on an "uncrowded" Indian train... not a pretty sight I tell you!)... So there they were... these 4 women... all teeth and smiles and giggles... One of the women opened up her wallet & pulled out a small plastic folder that had a couple of passport pics... She then proceeded to gleefully pass the pic around... showing off her "mera-walla"... her husband.... Encouraged and wanting to show-off their men too, the other ladies then went on to pull out pics of their husbands and pass them around... The light in their eyes and the smiles on their faces as they spoke of these men told me that they loved them quite a bit... I wondered... as I looked of the pics of these men who seemed pretty plain, as to what they had done to deserve women as these?... If only they could see what I saw... they'd hold their women close and whisper affectionate nothings in their ears... thanking God for this chance at something beautiful... For what could be better than to love and receive love in return?
... Not a damn thing!

Robert Frost

The woods are lonely dark and deep

And I have promises to keep

And miles to go before I sleep

And miles to go before I sleep...

Note to Self:

It is time to finally begin...
No more excuses anymore.
It IS time.
"Winners never quit,
And Quitters never win"

Thoughts on "Marriage"

Sometimes I love you... more than I can say
Other times you get on my nerves
That's just reality!

This can only be as good as we both can make it
We gotta make it work

...With arms wide open...

I backtracked... viewed my posts... and realized.
I've been acting real melancholy... when I have no reason to feel this way.
I've been blessed beyond measure... beyond my expectations...
There is a God who loves me
And even if all else fails...
I'm content and happy...
....knowing that I own the hearts of a few that truly care for me.
So I deleted the posts that were sad :)
And I'm ok.
I'm alright.
I don't need rescuing.
So move on to whatever life has in store for you...
... and stop worrying about me.
I'll be fine.
I've made it this far...
Life awaits me...
And I'm ready for it.... alive and awake... arms wide open :)

The Perfect Song to my Lord Jesus Christ...

There's always something in the way
There's always something getting through
But it's not me
It's you

Sometimes ignorance rings true
But hope is not in what i know
Not in me
It's in you

It's all i know

I find peace when I'm confused
I find hope when I'm let down
Not in me
But in you

I hope to lose myself for good
I hope to find it in the end
Not in me
In you
In you
In you

It's all i know
It's all i know
It's all i know

There's always something in the way
There's always something getting through
But it's not me
It's you
It's you
It's you

Thoughts On 'Cheating'....

Here' s an interesting line I heard on 'Everybody Loves Raymond'...

"God programmed men to sow their seed, where they may.....
He programmed women, to limit the crop to one farmer"
-Frank Barone

Too bloh-dee funny..... hehehehehe.......

The End....

The happily-ever-after fails
We've been poisoned by these fairy-tales
Offer up your best defense...
This is the end... of the innocence...

The King of Crap.... and other shitty places....

The above title came to mind as I turned on my idiot-box... and guess who was on TV?.... the King of Queens... While hugely successful and popular in the beginning.... the serial has run its course... the days when Doug and Carrie were that weirdly-paired couple that got through life in a fun-happening way.... are long past... Now they're both fat and Carrie's voice and complaints grate on my nerves like... like... like... ten nails screeching down a chalk-board..... ugh! I feel sorry for Doug... even though his idiosyncrasies are getting stupider by the day...

What are they trying to show us?

Love is blind.... but keep your eyes open if you're getting into marriage.... ???

If he's irritating as hell.... pray for patience... so that you don't kill him.... ???

The best things in life are free... but the stupid ones come cheap... ??? (my very own original line! whoopie!)

When I look at them... I don't feel like laughing anymore.... there's nothing cute about Doug and his antics... or Carrie and her constant nagging.... Life is not this comic play.... even though many people feel like they're stuck in their very own dramedy's.... Life is a whole set of complications... and all we can do is pray... pray hard and long and deep... that we don't marry a Doug (an insensitive cad who refuses to grow-up)..... or become a Carrie (irksome-husband-reforming-types).... coz if we do... one thing is certain.... we won't be laughing... and neither will the people around us.... You may get a call from NBC to do this new show though..... lol..... :)

Here's hoping you say NO to the show and YES to the right guy who's not Doug :)

Cheers!

Death at a Funeral.....

I saw this amazing movie... which has just the right amount of British humor.... just beautiful... given that the British are not known for their humor..... I like the way they say "bloh-dee" and "shit" :) ...... So getting back to the movie.... amazing concept.... it would be all ruined if they tried a Bollywood take on this.... There's a lovely song at the end...... rhythm that's like a bunch of soft cascading ribbons.... a perfect touch to a superb movie.... one I wouldn't mind watching with a bunch of cheeky friends... who get it.... The Valium (or-not-Valium-but-mostly-acid) and Simon tickled my funny bone... specially the part where he get's up on the roof... butt-naked... doing the birdie dance...... Go Simon! :) hehehehehe

The First.... of many....

With my intense need to talk...
and the fact that im losing my ability to write...
or think...
or dream...
this seems like a good idea.
Here's to many good conversations with myself...
Cheers!