So yea! I saw the movie...
Finally... whew!
It took me two days... coz I could only see it in small doses...
Viola was right when she said "Ajeeb"... it was a slip-of-the-tongue on her part... but oh! so true!
I mean I kinda expected a Hindi movie with dorky-faced Ranbir Kapoor to not make sense... but this exceeded even those expectations...
Where do I begin?
Enter Tony Braganza (dorky villian # 1.... yea! there's more than one dorky villian in this piece of shit called a "movie").... So well... Tony is an ass and he wants to marry Jenny (Katrina)... If she refuses to marry him... He will "forcefully" make her his wife in his bedroom... oooooooh!... Since when do men have to "forcefully" make women anything?... Is there a dearth of women to sleep around with?... Aren't men running away from marriage?? We women have to "force" them to commit!!!!... The best part is.... hehehehe.... Tony will financially help Jennys family if they convince her to marry him... So he has to pay her MONEY and still force her???.... what a loser!... hehehe
There's a lot of confusion as to Ranbir (Prem) & Katrina (Jenny's) proposal.... So Prem tells Jenny- "Jenny I like you a lot... Will you be my life-partner?" ... to which she replies "You've said all that I wanted to say"... Damn right sounds like a proposal to me! An "accepted" proposal... Not the case apparently.... When shes sent off to Goa to marry Tony... Prem rescues her and she admits to being in love with some other idiot named Rahul.... I was like come on! Why the hell were you prancing around to a love song with Prem then?
Even the beginning of the 'Tera hone laga hoon' song doesn't make sense... It goes something like..."shining in the setting sun like a pearl upon the ocean - come feel me - come heal me".... So you want her to touch you? or medicate you? Make up your mind dumb-ass! And so these idiotic lovers-or-not-lovers romance to this merry tune only for us -the stupid audience - to find out that it wasn't romance after all.... we are so dumb!... life-partner means "friend" doesn't it?? silly us...
And what's with the Indian Christian accent?.... So we all go like "Hey man! Hum aata... tum jaata... Hum God ko bolta hai... Humra Jejus bahut acha... (pronounced Jee-jus NOT jee-zus).... Come on! Give us some credit! We speak some pretty damn good Hindi... We are not all Tonys... Our grey cells aren't dead... Though the directors did try to kill us of boredom through this movie...
We survived it! Woo-hoo! Even the popcorn and fizz didn't help in making this dribble go down better...
Note to self: If it seems dumb... it usually is. Proceed only without a brain.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment